Luckie's Fabulous Tavern

Oh Luckie's...

Located just a few blocks from our house under the giant Power Plant Live sign, Luckie's features an expansive bar, huge area of outdoor seating and no toilet paper.

Seriously. The first thing I did was hit the restroom when we got here. Ladies, you know how when you walk into a restroom and you first check to make sure that there isn't anything disgusting looming in the bowl, then you check to make sure the door will shut, then you check to make sure it's not covered in pee...etc?...well, I walked down four or five stalls before finding one that didn't have human soup but still had interesting reading material on the walls (it's a bar, you can't expect much) and then to my dismay found no toilet paper. Running down several more stalls finally locating some, I washed my hands thoroughly and then laughed and the silverware setting sitting on a chair by the paper towels.

Dave had already ordered our Cokes, and we looked over the menu. We were just minutes into the dinner menu and were relieved to find out we could use our Groupon. We made up about half of their business at 5 p.m. yesterday. TV's blared the Navy v. Terps game and we set about ordering a chicken sandwich with cheddar cheese, side salads with ranch and Dave took the plunge on the hot turkey platter.

The waiter walked away with our menus and we looked forlornly at our empty glasses.

Our busy waiter set about fetching beverage for all the other patrons in the bar and as the minutes went by the annoyed tweets mounted. Had this guy not been so nice, I probably would have snapped. However, every time we interacted with him he was just so nice. By this point I was fully expecting burnt/or undercooked food, sucking ice to stay hydrated, and possibly contracting an infection from whatever was gluing my flip flops to the floor.

Here's where restaurant reviewing gets tricky. We can't rate this place the same way we would rate a place like La Tavola, or Prime. We have to rate this place on the level of other pub/bar type places. We expect simple pub style menus, we expect casual service, and we expect a certain amount of "eeeew, what is that on the floor?" It's a bar.

For being a bar, this place was pretty clean. It was sparsely staffed and likewise sparsely populated. Apparently not a lot of people eat at 5 p.m. when there's a big game going on in town. Meh.

So, finally after several tweets two full glasses of Coke show up and I was like "Yay! Thank you!" and he said "I read your mind" and then I muttered "you're apparently on mountain time" and then I wasn't mad anymore.

When the food arrived, the waiter brought over two more full glasses so he totally redeemed himself.

The food arrived. The salads looked wonderful. They were fresh, crisp and very very good. My sandwich was wonderful. Juicy chicken, fresh toppings, crisp fries. I would have been willing to eat my hat if I were the type of person to wear hats. Then the greatest shocker. . .

The hot turkey platter was delicious.

Seriously. It was Michigan good. Chunks of turkey breast, plain jane slices of bread, soaked in gravy, mounds of mashed potatoes. Stunning.

For the turkey platter alone, Luckie's you get 4 noms.

Houlinan's

We met up with our friends Jeff and his wife Marsha for dinner and drinks at Houlihan's using our Groupon. The restaurant has a casual contemporary feel to it. After a round of musical chairs in an attempt to find a comfortable and large enough table, we finally settled in the bar because of the happy hour specials.

We ordered two boozy teas, pitcher size (which was really just a bigass mug) and then ordered the regular order of spinach dip for an appetizer while we waited for our friends.

The menu here is pretty decent in size. It had a metal cover and page after page of food and drink options. The last two pages were...weird. There was a list of songs they play and hilarious horoscopes.

The appetizer came pretty quickly. It was 8 triangle slices of crispy flat bread sprinkled with cheese and seasonings and then drizzled with sour cream. Beside that was a small ramekin of steaming spinach dip. This stuff was wonderful. The dip was creamy and smooth, the toppings on the flatbread was just a hint of spicy and was complemented well with the dip.

Upon the arrival of our friends we squeaked in a couple more drink orders and then settled on some food. I ordered the stuffed chicken breast, Dave got the almond crusted tilapia, Jeff ordered the wedge salad with sirloin, and Marsha got the pan seared scallops. The food arrived beautifully. It was truly a lovely presentation...except for Dave's which was just...weird.

My dish was fantastic. It was a breaded chicken breast, butterflied and stuffed with cream cheese and herbs, then baked to perfection. It came with a side of mashed potatoes and crisp green beans. The cheesy insides ooozed out when I cut into it, which is just what you want whenever something is "stuffed" with something else. Delicious. The only complaint I have is that the green beans could have been cooked for about another minute, however they were very fresh and seasoned very well so it's a tiny complaint. The potatoes were homestyle, just enough lumps to feel homemade and slightly cheesy, garlicky and buttery. It was a perfect match. My dinner was big enough to have again the next night, which was fine by me.

Jeff's prime steak and wedge salad came with a 5 oz. top sirloin, with an iceberg wedge, smoked bacon, spicy pecans, roasted golden beets, grilled asparagus, creamy gorgonzola cheese, scallions, warm polenta croutons, buttermilk bleu cheese dressing. Jeff said that while everything certainly tasted good, the steak was super tiny, the polenta croutons were small and there were only two and the tiny slice of cheese was wonderful but just simply not enough.

Marsha's dish, the seared Georges Bank scallops, came with lemon-asparagus risotto, baby greens, and basil-infused olive oil. Her dish came with 6 medium-sized scallops which she said were cooked quite well and the risotto was very tasty. Again, as with Jeff's meal, there simply wasn't enough of it.

Dave's meal is too hilarious for me to discuss and you can find his reaction in his 2 cents section below.

Now, we were sort of nervous about our waitress at first because it didn't seem she wanted to pay attention to us, however she became increasingly better as the meal went on and by the end of it, we were very pleased with the service we received.

The drinks we ordered were really great. I got the long island iced tea, and Dave got the Tennesee tea which was peachy and tasted like juice.

Overall I'd say this place is a great place to go for apps and drinks after work, but lousy for dinner. The dinners were overpriced, possibly microwaved and just not worth it for the cost. However, we were all very pleased with the apps and drinks as well as the waitstaff. Overall I give it 2.5 noms.

Dave's 2 Cents

So, I promised myself I'd never review a chain restaurant, and after this experience, I doubt I ever will again.

I ordered the, and i quote, "ALMOND CRUSTED TILAPIA, Amaretto beurre blanc, fresh berries, grilled asparagus."

What I received was this. Microwaved fish, with a scalding hot outside and cool inside, extra almond crust, and STRAWBERRIES!

I feel sorry for the pallet of the guy/gal in the back that thought this was eatable!

I asked the waitress exactly why there were strawberries on my food, and she said, "They ran out of the berry blend, they subbed this out.

First off, restaurant 101, NEVER sub ingredients until you have spoken to the customer. Dislikes, food allergies, or just plain food taste conflict.

Common chef, if you run out of sugar for a receipt do you use conventions sugar or brown sugar instead?! hell no.

Short order chef, YOU FAIL. "86" a dish if you've run out of the ingredients.

And maybe try an oven next time and not a microwave.

Readers: This place is located in the middle of Baltimore's biggest tourist trap, Inner Harbor. They run their business of 85%or more on non-repeat business. Who CARES if they piss off travelers? They wont be back. And who cares about the locals when most of the money is coming from tourists?!

Avoid of you want a nice dinner, if you want some good appetizers and booze, try it out.